from our school newspaper, The Goblin, Vol. VII, No. VIII, May, 1973
I, the red-headed sister of a sophomore, do will to one Brown the Bell's ring (yes, I know he's a ding-a-ling) forever.
I, a senior with the talents of Edgar Allan Poe, Bob Hope, and Pablo Picasso, will my creativity to Stewart, Dale, Jim, Alex, Curly, and Lee in the hopes that if they take Advanced Math next year, they will have something to keep themselves amused like the jokes, stories, and "poems" I wrote.
I, Randy Musgrave, being of sound mind and excellent body, do hereby will these things to the following people: My car to Delbert Chapelle and H.P.D. in memory of the many tickets that they have given me. My scuba tanks to Bill Kisner to make his 6-barrell submergible. Two pints to Jim Short's cache to keep his mouth shut. A new set of ears to David Garrison and a quarter to Johnny.
I, Curtis Albina Pangle, do hereby will Lana Norton and Diane Wright ... Happiness.
I, Jim Tilley, will to Cheryl Ramsey, the ability to sit in a room with my parents and not turn red, the ability to not get caught playing around by her grandmother, a larger rear-view mirror so she can see "tin cans" and one, red rose.
I, Annette Borland, being of mushy mind and ineffable body, do hereby will Pam Elam the middle stick of gum in a package of Juicy Fruit with the hope that all her wishes come true, and to Kathi Brisco ... a bean jar full of happiness.
We, Beth, Annette, and Pam, do hereby will Ellen Davis a charge account at a local grocery store.
I, Debiee Stevenson, will to Kitty Bonsteel my uncanny talent of "watering the wagon."
We, the players of Barn's Billiards, will the class of '74 the ability to lose as much money as we did.
We, the senior track boys, will Rubin Drewry a police car to go along with his siren.
We, the anonymous group, will to Richie Arnold all our pornography so he will have something to do at SCA.
We, the senior girls, will to other Harrison girls the ability to stay away from Marlon Brando Beak ... it shouldn't be hard.
I, an anonymous boy of HHS, will Elaine Ashley all great things and a happy future.
We, a select group of senior boys, will Joe Bowers the ability to put the move on Ellen Davis instead of Barbie Young.
I, an anonymous member of speech class, will to Mrs. Shinn the ability to laugh at my jokes and not send me to the office.
We, the senior basketball players, will Coach Matthews a season as great as 72-73 minus the bad calls.
I, Jackie Mathis, owner of beautiful clothes, many shoes, gorgeous hair, and a tremendous body will all my athletic achievements, school honors, and all my prized belongings to Becky Thompson, my future wife.
I, Verlie McCutcheon, do will Becky Jones and Candy Amyx the ability to keep out of my personal business.
I, Enis Reeves, being of long, thin, round body, do hereby will to Debbie Estes the ability to grab red flags while riding in a truck at 40 MPH (with or without breaking her arm).
We, Lynn Gray and Bill Shaddox, do hereby will one gold, pink, and red stiped pair of double knit slacks to Sugar Bear to go with his black turtleneck top. P.S. See us for excellent fitting clothes.
To Mrs. Ruthie McCoy, the first period Senior English Class wills: 60% of the class of '73, a barrel of oil, one old "Hogan's Heroes" show (where the Germans lose), and a plantation in South America. The 5th period class wills to her: a raft and rubber ducky so she can float to Tahiti, 2 one-way tickets to the Kennedy and Roosevelt homes, a 6-ft. oppossum to set in her window sill, and an application for a Heritage Heights apartment at $30.00 a month.
I, Carol Wilson, being of short mind and body, do hereby leave to Joe Unwer 1/2 loaf of molded light bread and a 1/2 bottle of Zappal wine to celebrate becoming a senior. Have fun, Joe. To Susan Dunlap, I leave my ability to walk through the halls of HHS for 3 years without getting stepped on once.
I, Randy Cutburth, will to Paulette Cutburth, my wife, hope that in the first part of October, 1973, I will be the proudest father ever.
I, Tommy Everett, being of sound mind and body, hereby will my ability to make good grades in Mrs. McCoy's class to Mitch Callicot.
All the seniors of 4th period "G" II, leave to their beloved pedagogue the following items: a slightly used elf, an automatically erasing wall-to-wall blackboard and a couple of dumb students for him to assign 5,000 word themes.
We, Jimmy Tilley and Beth Hammerschmidt, will Dale "Afro" Harp another "Secret Admirer" to keep him occupied his senior year, since they will be at Hendrix next year.
I, Lana Scroggins, will to Kevin Carter a trip to Harvard as a janitor. If you can't fill that job, then I'll fix you up as their tape recorder.
I, Andy McCutcheon, being of not much mind and overweight body, do hereby will to Kevin Carter "Hilltopper" one Taiwan-made megaphone, so that when he brags about where he used to live, he can also be heard.
We, a few extremely imperfect seniors, hereby will to Annette Borland the ability to make an error. We love ya Annette, but you hurt our feelings.
I, Tom Greenhaw, being of unstable mind and dilapidated body, to hereby will Mr. Bob Dickson the power to stop hassling everyone.
I will to Vickie Reubell the ability to tell a Chevelle from a Cutlass.
We, the girls of HHS, will Jackie Mathis a date. Lord knows, he needs some.
We, the back and front rows of Shorthand II class, will to next year's class the ability to eat giant SweetTarts, Toastum Pop-up, Easter eggs, cookies, Pixie Stix, cinnamon and apple candy, and Hershey's M & M's and get caught when a little bird tell on us.
We a select group of senior boys, will Pat Reddell nothing because he thinks he's already got it all.
I, Argie Landis, being of mostly bod and beastly mind do hereby will Mama Bird a steady supply of pictures in next year's Physics class.
I, Andy McCutcheon, being of little mind and big body, do hereby will to "Bird Dog" Norvell, "Fuzz" Watts, John Terminella, and J.B. Moon one 1/2 gallon of Old Charter so they can pick up where I left off at State Tournament.
I, Elva Terry, will to the Honorable Buddy, Honorable Bill (alias Bob), and Honorable Robin the same table in study hall next year to talk about cars, girls, and chemistry. To Jan Scott, I will the pleasure of winning "Miss Harrison Teen" in '74. Good luck, kid.
I, a senior who has been blinded by flash bulbs more than once, will to Lee "Flash" Dunlap a year's supply so he won't have to drive to Fayetteville so often; an original, autographed copy of "Ring Out, Wild Bells"; and a lifetime supply of Speech lessons because he loves that class so much.
We, your best friends, will to you, Joe Morris, the ability to take a cut and not let it get you down. It's your only unredeeming quality.
I, Richard Burton, will a picture of my wife, Liz, to her look-alike, the beautiful, stunning, attractive, and wonderful girl we all love: Jil Gregg.
I, Guess Who, will to Cheryl Ramsey a ton of strawberries and a crowbar to get the window of the church open.
I, courageous senior girl, will to Jim Tilley a map of all the dirt roads in the vicinity of Harrison, so he won't take a wrong turn and end up in Chicago, a raft so he can brave those flooded low-water bridges, a medal for his match-making ability, a ten-speed bike for Hendrix, and a sincere thanks for his infectious sense of humor.
I will my beloved baseball teacher, Gopher, a batting average of .650, 49 RBI's, and the Triple Crown.
I, Miss X, now that I have a more optimistic outlook on life, will to Mike Hinkle the ability to lose gracefully and one girl that will get serious ... but not me.
I, Casey Jones, will Pam Patton one number 49 choo-choo train that will keep Mike Allen at home in her family room floor.
I, Beth Hammerschmidt, will the manager of the world, my friend, Pat Reddell, one ego to match Lynn King's foot size. Maybe if you put it on a diet, Red, you could get it through the door. And Pat ... don't get mixed up with any bad typewriters.
We, faithful members of Atomic Roosters, do hereby will Sandra Eidson the Hydrogen Duck and Cosmic Cootie Constitutions. Show us the old feathers and crowbar sign, girls.
I, the blue bruiser, do will Mary V. Webb five boxes of bandaids to cover up blue bruises, 500 pages of business ads to do by yourself, and the ability to live in Harrison next year.
I, Dan Garrison, will to "Tuck" Tolliver one afro comb and to "Bird Dog" one female Blue Tick.
I, Mike Hinkle, do will the following things to the following seniors of '74: To Pat Henson one swimming course to be taught in the flooded creek. To Steve Villines another CPA with her numbers straight.
I, Cheryl Ramsey, do hereby will to a certain underclassman, commonly known as Sylvester, the following: one song, "Dancing in the Moonlight," and one dilapidated pink possum, Spencer, who, although hurt and mistreated, will always love his father. I also leave Jimmy Tilley my black teddy bear ... that's all I can say.
I, Richie Poe, will Becky Jones 5 people doing 5 awful things, so that the next time she wants to cut somebody she won't have to make up accusations.
I, Becky Jones, will to Richie Poe a stack of Playboy and Esquire magazines so he can dream ... dream ... dream, to Kevin McCorkindale, a new hairstyle so that he won't look so much like a girl dog, to Mike Hinkle, the ability to say something obscene to a girl without getting slapped for it.
I, Linda Dickey, being of odd body and weak mind, do will to Tina Scroggins the job of being party chairman of the pit. Plan us a good one.
We, the super seniors of '73, do will the juniors and sophomores the ability to be half as good as they think they are.
We, absent-minded and strong-bodied Elva Terry and Elaine Ashley, do hereby will Watson Villines one basket of dirty laundry, one sign for his car which reads "Watson's Taxi Service," and two kissy poohs. Lots of luck.
We, Cheryl, Jim and Jil, being of supposedly scientific minds, do hereby will Argie Duncan the ability to buy his own refreshments on Science Fair trips and then the ability to handle it once he gets it.
I, Elaine Ashley, being of troubled mind and athletic body do will the other athletic bodies of my squad these things: To Cindy a pogo stick so she can't jump higher than the other cheerleaders. To Peggy a mule blinder for the wild rides in the van so you won't die of fright. To Kim and Ann Stevenson the ability to do not only front flips but also back flips on the Holiday Inn beds in Arkadelphia. To Nancy a pack of reversible zippers in case you put your uniform on wrong side out and hope they won't break. To Becky one pack of incense and a T.V. set. To Ann Fitton and Fernula a thirst quencher at the races. Have fun next year and good luck.
We, the members of the 1973 Physics class, will to our dear Mother who loves us all (or so she says) even though she is in love with Mark Spitz, Jonathan Livingston Seagull, and Buckminister Fuller: another Dan Hawkins to take her on science trips, another Richie Poe to disclose town gossip, another Clark Trantham to be Einstein, another Michael Cole who doesn't care, another Larry Keener to compete with Dick Poe, another Judy Martin and Jil Gregg who will stand up for Women's Lib and take physics, another Randy Musgrave to sleep through class, another John Crow with a teacher's lab manual, another Jim Short and Joe Bowers who are always gone someplace, another Argie Duncan with his camera, another Terry Young, Paul Oxenreider, and Glen Woodruff to make a well-rounded class.
I, a senior concerned for my junior friends, will Jan Scott the ability to keep her make-up on and not have to change it 16 times in one period.
We, Judy Martin and Mary Fleenor, being of weary bodies and frazzled brains, do hereby will to Richard Alan Young 2 hardworking fools to replace us, devoting all their time to Spanish and Drama Clubs.
I, Becky Jones, will Karla Skaug, my ability to flirt respectively and to some lucky girl the ability to pump gas and be special so "Fuzz" Watts will wave to her all the time.
We, the players of Barn's Billiards, do hereby will Trash the ability to play one game of pool without making a scratch.
I, a super senior of '73, do leave to Ralph Bishop, Sky King, and Greg Wilson 3 heating pads for their personal use after one of those cold, moonlit nights.
We, a select group of seniors, do hereby will John Terminella 12 bricks that go to the boys' bathroom.
I, Jackie Mathis, being of sound body and so bright mind do hereby will Debbie Breedlove and Sandra Eidson one pair of Big Mama panty hose.
We, Danny Roth, Jackie Mathis, Rich Arnold, and Joe Bowers, do hereby will Allen Harness, Time McFarland, Pat Reddell, and Storm Quattlebaum 52 cans of biscuit dough so they'll have one can for every weekend.
I, unknown, will to Zeke McFarland, the banker's talented and modest son, these things: a friendly neighbor, a muzzle for "Spook," and a speed-typing course.
I, Nita Grinder, will "Moon Beam," alias Bonnie Grinder, the ability to find a bathroom on dark, dusty dirt roads.
I, Brenda Stowe, being of sound mind and body do hereby will to my sister Nancy 500 jars of crunchy pickles in hopes that this noble gesture may keep the halls of HHS safe from her ravaging attacks as the biting and kicking crunchy dill pickle fiend.
I, Debbie Middleton, will Jan Scott the ability to not get so excited when Ronnie Waldon calls her from Fayetteville and then not to feel so bad when she finds out Ronnie has taken out R.R. when he came home for the weekend.
I, one tired senior, offer all those left behind one saying to be remembered always: "Never judge a principal by the color of his hair."
We, Jim Terminella and John Watts, will to the following people our appreciation and thanks: Coach Bill Smith, Coach Barry Molder, Herb Van Deven, Gerald Kelley, Betty Young, Jim Lee, Tommy Nelson, Ruth McCoy, and John Q. Adams. To the rest ... NOTHING.
I, Kevin Carter, superior manager of the '73 track team do hereby will to the '74 athletic teams the desire and ability of the '73 track team. To Greg Scroggins I will the ability to defeat his sister in basketball and one new pencil holder for his ear. To the '74 All-Sports managers I leave 3 coaches, none of whom know what to do with their managers.
We, the senior class, will to Mr. Van Deven any five pupils of the junior class.
I, Lynn King, being of small mind and very boring body, do will the following to my friends: Sherry Gillies--4 cases of tuna, a car that can make it through the deepest mud, and all the words to her favorite songs. Tim McFarland--my sister Mary Gayle, a motorcycle, and enough money to make it to California. Susan King--Daisy and gas to go to Mountain Home. Peg and Estes--one bottle of mucilage and D.H. Pat Reddell--I leave my most prized possession ... DoBee, and a wish that each one of you have a great year next year.
We, several senior girls, do will to Ellen Davis the ability to be thankful for all the things we could have willed her but didn't.
I, Jil Gregg, being of compact body and wandering mind, do will to Linda Dickey the ability to tolerate AKL especially when they all go to New Orleans and call back home apologizing for whatever. Hang in there, Dick, maybe someday Bill will introduce you to somebody in his fraternity.
I, Greg Carlton, will 544 tubes of paint remover to Harrison High School so that they can get the red off of their necks and back into their eyes where it belongs.
We, Anna Sue Johnson, Jackie Green, and Jil Gregg, do will to any 3 junior girls the ability to truck all the way to Arkadelphia and back through Fayetteville and find absolutely noboby we went to see.
We, the senior members of the cast of "Oklahoma," do will to Mr. Richard Alan Young the many moments of embarrassment and frustrated anger he caused everyone else--even when the end justified the means.
I, Bob Echols, being of super intelligence and flabby, do will Mrs. Grace a dozen green ink pens, and one sports writer with the ability to get at least one story written for each Goblin and also the ability to have the sports page completed in time for press. I also will Quad the ability to be as big a square next year as he claimed I was this year and the ability to make it through one whole year of school without squaring anyone, especially someone of the opposite sex.
I, slender, dark-haired senior, will to Cheryl Ramsey one Raggedy Ann to keep Andy company, a cigar to someone who likes the smell of smoke, and my hopes that '74 is the year '73 was.
I, alias Mr. X, will Debbie Henley one quick course in C.P.A. instruction, one tank of gas to go to Waldron (Heaven), a more optimistic attitude, a few more boys with less stickum on them, and one boy that doesn't get serious.
I, Pam Elam, a super senior of '73 will to: Brenda Stone--a new hope ring so that all the rest of her dreams will come true. Richie Poe--a piano for his church. Annette Borland--a pink striped towel in which to wrap all her high school memories. The class of '74--all the happy "senior" times I had in '73.
We, the seniors of 4th period Algebra II, will Mr. Kelly more students like Betty Scarsdale to make next year even more successful.
I, Donna Magness, hereby will to Joe Unwer the ability to wreck 2 cars, get along with his former boss and the workers, keep fully dressed while dancing, and keep up the rap sessions we have had with others.
We, Donna Magness and Carol Wilson, do hereby will Monte Smothers the ability to stay in school one full day without skipping.
I, Eddie Snow, being of sound mind and muscular body, do hereby will Rickey Moore and Roger Hawkins the right to take a dip in Crooked Creek during lunch hour. I also will Monte Smothers and Tom Keeling the front door key to the Country Club so they can stay out of trouble during their senior year.
I, Tom Greenhaw, being of small mind and large body, do gratefully will Mrs. McCoy a paid chair at Herb's Complete Barber Service so she can have her own head shaved.
I, Carol Wilson, do hereby will to Barbie Young the whole town of Valley Springs, Arkansas. Get that Tiger!
We, the senior members of the Harrison High School marching band, will Betty Scarsdale the following: beginner baton with a full 60-page book on "How to Twirl", a gold sequin uniform and shiny knee boots with foam rubber soles, and beauty parlor appointments every Friday at 2:30.
We, Lynn, Beth, and countless other seniors, being of proud heritage and Goblin spirit will Coach Matthews our thanks for a (needless to say) exciting 1973 basketball season and for the hopes that next year won't be the "year of the ref."
I, Lu Colliver state this: to John Wallis I give all the affection and goodwill my teachers bear me plus my charm and sweetness. To Teresa Smith I give all the boys that didn't swarm around me. To Sherrie Bohannon I give the ability to hypnotize her in spite of Richard.
We, Debbie Moore and Becky Martin, will to one lazy Dan Hawkins a year's supply of absentees to do by himself and to know the difference between the lady and men teachers' bathrooms.
I, Mary Fleenor, being of sound mind and body, do hereby will to Kelly Green my place in the trombone section. Good luck.
I, Kathi Brisco, being of sound mind and absolutely beautiful body, do hereby will Mari Alice Watkins and Don all the happiness in the world in their new life.
We, Greg Carlton and Kevin McCorkindale, basketball managers for the '73 season will the basketball managers for next season a genuine J. E. Dunlap, Jr., Do-It-Yourself sports writing kit. We also will next year's managers the guts to listen to Lawrence Welk and his champagne band for 5 hours of practice each day, to carry 2 cases of Coke and 48 Snickers bars at the same time, to misspell names on the scoreboard, to throw only 3 clipboards at the referees during an entire season, and to get only 2 technicals for writing wrong names in the score book.
I, Rick Still, will to Michael Cole a one-way trip to Hot Springs only if he promises not to come back.
I, Danny Roth, being of sound mind, beautiful, muscular and vivacious body, will to the remaining High School boys my ability to attract women at any time, any hour, any minute, in any place.
I, Anonymous, being of sound mind, beautiful, muscular and vivacious body, will to the remaining High School girls my ability to resist the high school boys who are dumb enough to try to act like Danny Roth.
I, Anna Sue Johnson, having enjoyed my noon time meals, will to Melissa Campbell a new location to eat her peanut butter crackers next year.
We, the seniors, will to Mrs. Raney another Danny Watts to make her day.
I, Donny Gredell, with rocky mind and lanky bod, will my pride and joy--my blue roundball sneakers--to the tall squirrel, better known as Rose Bud who had better make good use of them.
I, Brenda Stone, will to Marcus McNew all the dreams that I never dreamed would come true.
We, seniors, will to Coach Wray one track boy with short legs and long brains and an ego to match his own.
I, Kevin McCorkindale, with hairy head and corndog body, will all my sugar crisps to the bear who thinks he is black turtle or at least from the neck up, otherwise known as Dick Allen.
I, a Super Senior of '73, do will Becky Jones the ability to keep her braces in her own mouth instead of someone else's.
We, the senior members of Mrs. Shinn's 3rd period speech class, bequeath to her one fantastic actor with a super memory and a closed mouth and an open mind.
We, the senior members of Becky's Art I, 1st period class, do will her one true artist every year until Tom Greenhaw becomes hard working ... in other words, forever.
We, the 3rd period DE Class, will to Eli Roomsburg a new bunch of juniors, hopefully to help him more than this year's juniors did.
I, Michael Cole, of unsound mind and unfit body, will to my sister, Becky, the ability to brown nose the teachers and the ability to get along with Betty Scarsdale in the band for one more year.
I, John Crow, will to any member of the junior class one point of my IQ which doesn't hurt mine a bit, but doubles any of theirs.